Tag: rent

“Blurtso forgets his mittens”

Off I go! said Blurtso, streaking out the door. Places to go, things to do, I’d better pick up the pace, I’m late, late, late!

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Hey, why are my hoofs so cold? Oh no, I forgot my mittens! I guess it’s back I go. Up the walk, through the door, grab my mittens, go, go, go. Ahhhh, that’s better, said Blurtso. That’s more like it. Snug and soft, happy on the hoof. Now, what was I doing? Where was I rushing to?

“Bonny and Pablo go for tapas”

There’s a bar on Inman Square named after Salvador Dali.

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Ración de tortilla y una caña, said Pablo.
Y para la señorita? said the barkeep. Lo mismo, said Bonny.

“Blurtso and Harlan consider Christmas”

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I suppose some people get depressed at Christmas, said Blurtso. And New Year’s, said Harlan. I suppose, said Blurtso, the memories make you reflect on what you do and don’t have. Too often, said Harlan, on what you don’t. Is there any more cocoa? said Blurtso. Yes, said Harlan, plenty. And whipped cream? Yes, said Harlan, a full can.

“Blurtso stands in the snow” (V)

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Welcome to tonight’s discussion sponsored by “The Campus Institute of Political Seriousness for Enhanced Living in an Unenhanced World.” I’m your host, Jonathan Wellborn Truington III, and joining us this evening is Mr. Blurtso Lundif, a third-year diversity fellow at Harvard College, who has garnered attention in Cambridge as, “the donkey who stands in the snow.” Please tell us, Mr. Lundif, if you would, what is your opinion of the current political climate in our nation’s capital? The political climate? said Blurtso. Yes, said Mr. Truington. I don’t know anything about it, said Blurtso. Do you think, said Mr. Truington, that the politicians should all go stand in the snow? It couldn’t hurt, said Blurtso. And what have you accomplished, said Mr. Truington, by standing in the snow? Accomplished? said Blurtso. Yes, said Mr. Truington, what have you learned? I’ve learned to stand still, said Blurtso. To stand still? said Mr. Truington. Yes, said Blurtso. Anything else? said Mr. Truington. Isn’t that enough? said Blurtso. Well, said Mr. Truington, I suppose it is… and where exactly do you stand? Anywhere, said Blurtso. Anywhere? said Mr. Truington. Yes, said Blurtso, anywhere that’s snowy and cold. Is there something, said Mr. Truington, that inspires you to do it? Yes, said Blurtso, it’s compelling to stand in a public place that is empty… and where, if someone does appear, they move so quickly they may as well not be there. I see! said Mr. Truington, standing in the snow is an indictment of the modern world and its frenetic pace! Is it? said Blurtso. Does it bother you, said Mr. Truington, if others stand in the snow next to you? No, said Blurtso, as long as they don’t ask questions. Questions? said Mr. Truington. Yes, said Blurtso, about why I’m standing in the snow. Of course, said Mr. Truington, and apart from your scathing attack on people in a hurry, what other statements are you trying to make? Are you attempting to draw attention to a charitable cause? Are you trying to see how long you can stand before collapsing? No, said Blurtso, I go home whenever I want. And how do you know, said Mr. Truington, that it’s time to go home? As soon as I start walking, said Blurtso, I know it’s time to go. Remarkable, said Mr. Truington. Well, ladies and gentlemen, there you have it, neither ice, nor sleet, nor snow will stop this remarkable coed from making his stand. Please join us next week when our featured speaker will be Somerville’s own self-deprecating playwright and hairbrush salesman, Reverend Willy J. Loman.

 

“Blurtso considers his inner parakeet” (IX)

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Is Blurtso still pining for Lizzy? Actually, said Pablo, he’s doing much better since he converted the house into an animal shelter.

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Circle from side to side, said Blurtso, shifting your weight from hoof to hoof… left hoof full, right hoof empty, right hoof full, left hoof empty…