And they came from near and they came from far,
bearing gifts of frankincense, myrrh, and pumpkin pie.
Tag: pumpkin pies
“Blurtso and Harlan give thanks”
Where is everyone? said Harlan. I don’t know, said Blurtso,
I guess people don’t eat on Thanksgiving.
“Mr. Limbaugh blasts Blurtso on the air”
“There goes another donkey,
eating a pumpkin pie at the Taxpayer’s expense.”
“Blurtso can’t eat the same pumpkin pie twice”
Heraclitus, said the professor, was a Greek who wrote, “You can’t step into the same river twice…” Why would anyone step into a river? said Blurtso, that’s what bridges are for. You can’t step into the same river, continued the professor, because the river is always changing, and when you step in a second time, it’s a different river, and you are changing too, and are not the same as when you first stepped in. In fact, repetition is a myth, it’s impossible… I’m sorry, said Blurtso, I’m afraid I wasn’t listening, could you repeat that?
“Blurtso is inspired by his second assignment”
Giotto di Bondone, better known as Giotto, was an Italian painter and architect from Florence in the late Middle Ages. Considered the first in a line of great artists who contributed to the Italian Renaissance, his paintings and frescos glorify God and the Roman Catholic Church…
“Blurtso reads Proust”
Mmmm, said Blurtso, taking the first bite of the pumpkin pie he was eating and thinking of all the pumpkin pies he had ever eaten. Mmmm, said Blurtso, taking the second bite of the pumpkin pie he was eating and thinking of all the pumpkin pies he had wanted to eat. Mmmm, said Blurtso, taking the third bite of the pumpkin pie he was eating and thinking of the all the pumpkin pies he was going to eat. Mmmm, said Blurtso, taking the last bite of the pumpkin pie he was eating and wondering where his pumpkin pie had gone while he was eating.
“Blurtso thinks with his stomach in calculus”
Who would like to solve this equation? asked the professor when he had finished filling the chalkboard with numbers, letters, and symbols. How about you in the front row, the one with the boxing-glove nose…
“Blurtso teaches creative visualization” (II)
As you shift to the left, said Blurtso, the upper hoof extends, lets go, and is replaced by the lower hoof which becomes the upper hoof as you shift to the right… the lower hoof is yin rising to yang… the upper is yang descending into yin… in the same way that all things come and go… cupboard full… cupboard empty… stomach full… stomach empty… see the pumpkin pie… see the empty tin… pumpkin pie… empty tin… pumpkin pie…
“Blurtso teaches creative visualization” (I)
As you circle from side to side, said Blurtso, imagine your arms are a banner attached to a flag pole, a banner waving in a warm breeze, a banner on top of a pumpkin pie factory, announcing a pumpkin pie sale…
“Blurtso goes green” (IV)
It sure is warm in here, said Harlan. It sure is, said Blurtso. That’s because a greenhouse, said Alex, turns solar energy into thermal energy, which in turn creates a convection process. What? said Blurtso. Solar energy, said Alex, passes through the glass and gets absorbed by the ground and plants. The plants convert the sun’s short wave infrared rays into long wave infrared rays—into heat energy—which can’t escape the glass. Because the air is trapped, the warm air near the ground rises and the cool air near the ceiling falls, turning the greenhouse into a convection oven which forces the air to become warmer and warmer with each rise and fall. A convection oven? Said Blurtso. Exactly, said Alex. Does that work on a small scale? said Blurtso. Of course it does, said Alex. So I could bake a pumpkin pie, said Blurtso, in a miniature greenhouse?