Mmmmmm, thought Blurtso, the food here is very good. And these chocolate-chip muffins are excellent! “Isn’t the COOP a great bookstore?” said a co-ed at a neighboring table. Bookstore? thought Blurtso. Is this a bookstore?
Tag: humor
“Blurtso raps”
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
you can see him coming…
when you see his nose…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
he’s one with nature…
he wears no clothes…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
cloven-hoofed, dulce-toothed…
suave-duro, burro-puro…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
everything he thinks, everybody knows…
backward… forward…
take an inch… take a mile…
everything he does, does it with a smile…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
papi-fresco, don-juan-es-co…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
everything he thinks, everybody knows…
backward… forward…
take an inch… take a mile…
everything he does, does it with a smile…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
coming… going…
you’ll know it by his nose…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
burro-puro, suave-duro…
poco inocente, muy maduro…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
Blurtso comes… Blurtso goes…
everything he thinks, everybody knows…
“Blurtso considers ontology”
I am what I do,
and I do what the universe does.
“Bonny and Ditto share some quality time” (XII)
When painting a portrait… you should place your subject
in a posture that has ongoing implications.
Excellent! said Bonny.
“Blurtso walks across the Common”
Ahhh, the first snap of autumn,
co-eds on the Common, professors in the halls,
coffee in the cups, bulletins on the walls,
… and animals preparing for winter..
“Blurtso loses track” (II)
What are you looking at? said Harlan. There’s a knot in one of the roof boards, said Blurtso. Yes there is, said Harlan. I wonder how it grew that way? said Blurtso. I don’t know, said Harlan, the wood around it is smooth and symmetrical. A whirlpool in the stream, said Blurtso. Yes, said Harlan. I wonder if the roof is weaker or stronger where there is a knot? said Blurtso. I believe it’s weaker, said Harlan, because when the wood gets dry the knots can pop out. Yes, said Blurtso, now that you mention it, I’ve seen old boards with holes where the knots had been. I guess there’s no good reason, said Harlan, for a knot to remain in a board after it has already asserted its independence by going against the grain. Maybe this one, said Blurtso, asserted its independence by staying.
“Blurtso loses track” (I)
What are you doing? said Harlan. I’m looking at a piece of straw, said Blurtso. Oh, said Harlan. It’s a very nice piece, said Blurtso, with lovely color and shape. Yes it is, said Harlan. It’s been a while, said Blurtso, since I really looked at something—it’s quite refreshing. How long have you been looking? said Harlan. I’m not sure, said Blurtso. That long? said Harlan.
“Blurtso becomes a barometer”
I wonder if there’s a storm coming? A change in the barometer always makes me restless. Then I have to do something to feel better…
That’s better…
“Blurtso speaks Greek” (II)
Are you a student? said the professor. Yes, said Blurtso. What’s your major? I don’t have one, said Blurtso. Maybe you should take my class on Greek drama, said the professor. We’re going to stage “Oedipus Rex” in October, the quintessential story of blindness and self-discovery. Blindness and self-discovery, said Blurtso, isn’t that an oxymoron? Have you ever done any acting? said the professor. Yes, said Blurtso, I did some barnyard Shakespeare last year, but I ad libbed most of the dialogue. Well, said the professor, this will be a formal production, with a paying public, but the students in my class will be given walk-on roles. Hmm, said Blurtso, “Oedipus Rex.” Are there any elephants and ducks in the play?
“Blurtso speaks Greek” (I)
Doo dee doo dee doo, sang Blurtso, skipping across campus.
Ananta, katanta, paranta…
Pardon me, said the professor, what did you say? I don’t know, said Blurtso. You said “ananta katanta paranta,” where did you learn that? It’s just something I say, said Blurtso. It’s from the 23rd book of Homer’s Illiad, said the professor. Really? said Blurtso. Yes, said the professor, from the scene where the donkeys and mules are being driven into the hills to gather firewood. Loosely translated it means, “upalong, downalong, sidealong,” and is famous for the way the Greek syllables—ananta, katanta, paranta—simulate the clippety clop of the animals’ hooves. Wow, said Blurtso, my hooves speak Greek!