Tag: charles river

“Weohryant University” (XXI)

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Sure, said Chelsea, I’d love to see your den.

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No, said Morton, I haven’t seen any worms.

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Yes, said Glouster, very fine form.

 

“Blurtso and Harlan consider manipulation”

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Do you ever get the feeling, said Blurtso, you’re being constantly manipulated? By the advertisers? said Harlan. Yes, said Blurtso, by the newspapers, and billboards, and radio, and television, and Internet, and loudspeakers at ball games. And signs, said Harlan, painted on city buses? Yes, said Blurtso, everywhere I turn someone is telling me what to want and what to think. And people are inviting the advertisers, said Harlan, to live in their pocket. In their pocket? said Blurtso. Yes, said Harlan, the iPhone6 will be available soon.

“Alex takes her friends to the street” (VII)

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I forgot to water my pumpkins this morning, thought Pablo, I wonder what the temperature is today?

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The zoo is open until dusk, thought Harlan, and the elephant cage is right by the entrance.

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I wonder, thought Ditto, if Dustin Pedroia ever played rightfield?

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Ditto’s birthday is tomorrow, thought Bonny, I hope the Dustin Pedroia jersey isn’t too small.

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The team is really focused today, thought Alex, the championship is as good as won.

“Alex takes her friends to the street” (VI)

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Wow, thought Blurtso, today’s game decides the championship. I’ve never been a champion. I set a record in the ski jump, but was disqualified for being a donkey. That was a relief, because the paparazzi went away. There aren’t any paparazzi here. Or any fans. I guess they’re all at home, listening on the radio. I wonder who’s doing the broadcast? I’ll bet it’s Jerry Remy. I wonder if Jerry Remy played stickball? He grew up in Somerset, so he probably played baseball, on real grass. That would be distracting, playing on grass. As distracting as playing in a pumpkin pie factory. You don’t see many sporting events in pie factories, for just that reason. I wonder if the winners get a trophy? I’d love to have a trophy, tall and shiny, with an action figure on top. Maybe a donkey taking a Ruthian sing, or a donkey making an over-the-shoulder catch, or a donkey gunning down a runner from third. A trophy would look great in the barn, with a little straw around the base. I wonder if being a champion would go to my head? I wonder if I’d begin to stay out late, and go to nightclubs, and get in trouble with the law? The paparazzi would revel in my fall, encouraging the cracks in my character. And I have many cracks. I’m not a role model. I have too many vices… pumpkin pie, hot cocoa, whipped cream. I wouldn’t want anyone to imitate me. I would be a terrible champion. But I sure would like a trophy, tall and shiny, in the middle of the barn.